how you act in day-to-day life.
Not last night, but the night before I dreamt that I bought cherry chapstick, put it on and turned into Katy Perry. The next day at college cherry chapstick was all I could think about, i ended up dragging my friend around superdrug, savers and boots in an attempt to buy some. After I'd bought it I was too scared to put it on, incase i DID turn into Katy Perry and there was no way I could ever turn back. After about 5 hours and a couple of danish pastries I mustered up the courage to put it on. I didn't turn into Katy Perry. All that bother over feck all. Goddamn.
MORE THINGS I'D LIKE TO HAPPEN THIS DECADE
I've really been giving this some thought since I wrote my last blog. ANYTHING could happen in the next 10 years which obviously is pretty exciting, so here are more of my wishes for the next decade.
World almost ends but then doesn't.
On the 29th April, 2012 the sky will go black at 12.37pm. The world is about to end because President Will Smith (sponsored by McDonalds®) has invested too much money into cow cloning due to a food shortage. There will be radioactive disaster somewhere in Mexico causing almost everyone to die. Luckily however, the makers of Dr Who and Back to the Future are holidaying together in Florida, and manage to go back in time to stop the disaster. Marty McFly and the Doctor actually become real and travel together, in a spin-off series of Doctor Who called “Back to the Tardis.” Pope Gok Wan I will comment “We’re lucky to have you, stay safe doll”
Queen gets really really drunk on national television
Some glorious man will slip some rohypnol into the Queen's tea and she'll get ridiculously intoxicated live on television. She'll call the Scots "wankers" and she'll accuse Jewish people of "taking all my money". The Daily Mail will claim it's just a hoax and the Daily Sport will comment on the colour of her bra (which she'll show us, by the way). The Independant however will have some sort of amazing, iconic photograph with "THE DAY OUR NATION WAS DISGRASED" or something else spelt correctly.
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