I have so many guilty pleasures it isn't even real, it's almost like my whole moody, well-clothed persona is just a complete sham and that I'm actually a giggling wreck of mascara and McDonalds vouchers (I actually have a section in my bus pass wallet dedicated to them). For example, I don't like Coldplay, but I really don't see why theyre meant to be so awful PLUS I've never actually given U2 a proper listen, so I have no idea if they're actually brilliant or bloody awful, but Bono is deffo an arse.
Lord of the Rings
I used to love these films beyond belief when I was in year six. Everyday I prayed and prayed that my school would host a 'dress up as your favourite book character' so I'd be able to dress up as Lady Eowyn (Arwen pissed me off) and someone else in my year would dress up as Faramir and we'd fall in love. It never ever happened. From year seven to last week I completely grew out of this phase of my life, to have it rekindled VERY SUDDENLY and it feels so good to be able to call people “Craig, Son of John” or call bus drivers “m’lord” or children “young hobbit” again. The only flaw I need to point out is that DOESN’T ARAGORN LOOK LIKE MONICA FROM FRIENDS?????????////!!!!!!!!!!1111oneone
Advertising
It works so so so well on me it’s completely ridiculous. I hysterically laugh every time I see the Go Compare man’s chubby little face light up my television screen and I cannot wait to buy a car so I can use it to find the cheapest deals on car insurance. Unfortunately, I won’t be able to see what direct line can offer me because they cut out the middle man and don’t use price comparison sites. Ps. I once bought some diet coke because it had a £5 off ASOS voucher; I don’t even like asos or diet coke. I hate confused.com.
Katy Perry
Her and Russell Brand getting married made me really happy and I have no idea why. It isn’t her music, I just like HER, not in a lesbian way, but in a "oh Katy, if you knew me we'd definately be best friends" sort of way. I know we'd go shopping together but not in a faggy Sex in The Cities way, because when we'd stop for lunch we would devour a big meaty burger and a beer instead of rice crackers and air. We'd discuss our crazy adventures we'd like to have together (not in a lesbian way) but more like how we'd stop pirates and escape from prison together. I'm not lesbian for Katy Perry to make things clear, I just WANT TO BE HER FRIEND.
Come Dine With Me
This program is the best program EVER. Whoever came up with the idea and original format for Come Dine With Me is a complete genius. For example, I once saw one where Jimmy Osmond hired a midget dressed up as Elvis and one where Nancy Sinatra (it wasn't Sinatra, it was the one married to Vic Reeves, oh wait..) Nancy Reeves made sausage and mash that looked like a willy and FLOPPED, what more could you possibly want from a telly show? Oh, just noticed that the picture I got to accompany this definition of why it's so good is actually of the episode I'm taking about. Anyway, come dine with me is great.
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